Re: Shadow

When I see "Shadow"... it only reminds me unhappiness, darkness, sorrow and a reflection image.

What is the meaning for you?

Long time ago, I walk from the darkness, behave the sorrow along the time…

Just like you…

Suffer the pain I never had before…
Suffer the loneliness I never face before…
Scare of people… Scare of myself.

Always scare to facing the facts… don’t wish to tell the feeling to the world…
Just wish to put it into the place that deep inside my heart.
Cover with depression, conceal with the broken heart.
Let the pain burn my soul… let the sadness torture my spirit.
Avoid everything and evade anything.

Especially myself.

From the time, only understand and sense the mono tone surround within my world.
The darkness shadow covers the entire life and block out the meaningless of life.
It make me weak… it make me wear out.
It makes me exhausted.

Always carry the “Shadow”… I felt myself so tired. So lonely.

Mind set always recall the moment that cherish between myself and the other.
Just make me more dislike to break off with the memories.
Just make me disagree the fact is true.
Just make me can’t help myself.

I cry… I sorrow…

Some one say, I lost out the real person of myself.
Never see me fall down so hard, not even stand up with my bare feet.
Or, push up and sustain my body balance when I down to earth.

People worry, people pay serious attention…
I am still suffering the pain within my soul.

Time passer by…
Leave only the fact that I need to outward to be with…
Unwillingly to let it be…
Offering resistance to believe…

Same like you…

Lack of the confidence and faith with love…
Absence my trust to life and some one…
Uncertainty on the integrity of belief to everyone else...

Just wish that is the end of my time…
Down to six feet under… bury myself forever.

But, do you understand how does it feel when some one is care about you?

I only selfish to apply the pain to some one who loves me…
Just like using a knife stab into the heart, torn up the soul from the body…
Penetrate the mortal and let it bleed to dead…
Make other people soul cry in helpless.

Just like you at this moment…

When I knew, the shadow still attached within your soul.
Covering your heart and recall all your sadness memories…
Let yourself hard to leave it alone…
Even the truth is acceptable with you mind.

Do you know how I feel?

I understand myself if never pull out from the darkness… I will be forever trap inside the evil soul…
I don’t wish to see myself like that… even bare in front your eyes…
I don’t wish to see you cry… cry for my soul.

I try so hard to let myself free…
Free from the darkness… leave the sorrow away and leave it to the shadow.

Let the shadow carry away… carry away all my misery and pain.
I wish to walk away from the darkness, waiting the new light shine upon myself…
If anything happen, will only let it be wait over here…
In the room of my heart, wait for me like a stone…

I try so hard to do that…

Just wish the room forever close deep inside my soul.
Never will be review or expose any more.
The door will shut, shut with the key from my heart.
Seal up the room and never let the light reach over here forever.

Let the darkness band with the shadow.
Let the shadow melt into the darkness.

Depart the shadow forever…

Visible in my outward appearance…
Only let your love warmth beneath my heart.
Let the time be my counterpart and heal my scar.

I know is hard to move past… but once I be through to the moment.
I set my soul free.

I believe it…

With your shadow, I hope you can submerge the pass into the room that I mention before, seal the shadow within the room…
Let the darkness band with your shadow… let the shadow melt into darkness.

Only you can help yourself within your heart… I only can wait for you at the surface and help you out from there.
Once you are out from the past, I can let my light shine upon you.
Not using my light to cast the shadow behind of you.

I am not the substitute of the shadow… I am not the alternate of the darkness.

I am jealous…
When you set the appearance in a similar for standing with me to your shadow…

I am reluctant that you are commemorating the past of it…
I am be discordant what you think of me and confront myself with it…
I am strongly guard and scramble when you compensate me…

But I only silent myself and let you feel I am not like that…
Just wish you to feel I am there for you…
No matter how, No matter when, No matter where…
I just be there for you.

Last…

Wish you understand and conceive what ever you have at this moment…
Cherish what you have… Cherish what you own…
With my love, I am asseveration for you…
Pledge my heart and soul for you ever after.

With Love,
Love only you forever.